Special Report: Fashion Battle 2008

Words by Lauren T
Pictures by Lauren P

Dry your tears, ladies, I know our consistent losing streak in football is disappointing, but who cares when we have the Hottest fashion club in MoCo?

Yeah bitches, that's right, the, ahem, home team dominated last night in the MoCo Fashion Battle 2008 DJ'dbyDJFlavaandDJTay at Blair. (Love you, Flava, but I was still disappointed by the conspicious absence of my favorite WKYS morning show host, Russ Parr. )

But don't get me wrong, the competition was fierce. Watkins Mill and Magruder, you were worthy competitors.

Actually, I'm not gonna lie, Watkins Mill was pretty hot with their Chicago remix show. I was impressed. They used everyone's favorite songs-- Cell Block Tango, All That Jazz, When You're Good to Mama, etc and mixed em up with thumping techno beats. I know that the actual clothes are supposed to be sort of secondary to the putting on a show/modeling aspect, but love the updated 20's glamour--fishnets, t-straps heels, and bobs. Hot!

Start the car, I know a whopee spot..
Where the gin is cold and the piana's hot! And all...thaaaaat...jaaaaaaaaaazzz!
That jazz.
The standout model from Watkins Mill, whom I nicknamed Leggy.
And then he ran into
my knife...he ran into my knife TEN TIMES!
Day-um.

Summary of Watkins Mill show: Let's all drive to hell in a fast car and keep it....HOT! Nice going, ladies.

Next up: Magruder.

The premise of this one was a little less clear. But it had something to do with these mad scientists (the idea of which was conveyed by their choice of Swedish synth pop music, due to our culturally ingrained notion that all Scandanavians are scientist/robots and/or synth pop artists) who created these robots who would carry out their nefarious plan, which I interpreted to be something along the lines of this: "WE WILL....
"BRING BACK....
.....THE EARLY 90'S!!! MUAHAHA!!"
Style Police: "Oh helllll no."
"I'm hot."
"No homo."

"Foiled! And I would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for that no-good, rotten, meddling style police..."*the early 90's die once again*

But for real, Magruder was good, and those gals walked something fierce.

Now let's proceed to the stars of the show....Monnnntgomery Blaaair High School!
Their theme was 101 dalmatians, which I thought was creative. In it
Courtney, the captain, was Cruella and she wanted to round up all the puppies-- the blacks, the whites, and the spotted, so, naturally, she could challenge them to a walk-off.

So basically, Blair won through a combination of hard work,
attitude,

more attitude,

creativity,
and gratuitous nudity.

Givin Leggy a run for her money.

But seriously, give it up for the male models. Blair had like 10x more, literally, than the other schools, and ours could walk just as good as the gals.



So in the end it turned out
3rd: Magruder
2nd: Watkins Mill
WINNER: Blair

But you all probably figured that out by now.
God damn, I'm glad Northwood didn't show up, I would have been up even later.
Night, kids, and don't stress too much about APs.
"

Work that trophy, Terrance!